Internal Flames

I struggled with what to post this week. Do I write about the state of emergency black people are in and potentially add to our anxiety and anger?. Do I write about something else? Which quite frankly who the fuck cares about anything else right now.

I’ve felt every single emotion possible this week. Many at the highest levels I’ve experienced in a very long time. I had a hard time staying calm and positive. I felt hopeless thinking about the future. Meditation was difficult, because tears flowed once my breathing was under control. I even implemented a new exercise routine to assist me in staying sane. I pushed myself harder with the mission to get stronger so I can fight back when my moment arrived. Needless to say this past week was rough.

I am hurting and everyone around me is hurting. Honestly, I’m unsure what to do with these feelings some days. Everyone has a different opinion and understanding of what is taking place due to this continual outrage. Scrolling social media is a mix of feeling extremely overwhelmed and a place to run to for relief. This fiery energy many of us are feeling is sparking change within and around us. Despite its mentally draining capabilities we are collectively progressive.

Being mindful and creating a healthy balance of what we do and consume each day is imperative now. Understand that what is destroyed ultimately gives us the opportunity to rebuild. I encourage you to feel your feels, express them to the people around you, and increase your level of self care.

We owe that to ourselves.