What Do You Bring To The Table?
What do you bring to the table? I can guarantee we have either asked or have had to answer this question at some point. I’m sure the answer was always surrounded around our best characteristics and achievements. Naturally we want to highlight the perfect parts of us to help validate why we are such a great catch in the dating world.
I can honestly say anytime I had to answer this question I was quick to rattle off all the parts of me that are appealing. I would say I bring beauty, brains, independence, and loyalty to the table. I would even say I was the greatest girlfriend a dude could ever have. On the flip side, when men would answer this question they would equally detail their best qualities often including that they had a good job or made good money. All of this sounds attractive until you start spending time with each other and learning the less desirable qualities. You know the ones they forgot to mention.
We never bring up our less favorable attributes, which we also bring to the table. What about the dark parts of us that we bring. The parts our partner has to learn about us through conversation. The parts we have to learn and then understand by spending time together. The parts of us that maybe we haven’t acknowledged or healed from ourselves. Many of us bring baggage from the past, childhood traumas, mental health issues, low self-esteem, and insecurities. Most of which our potential partner never learns about up front through our own admission.
So sit with yourself at that table and ask yourself this question “What do I really bring to the table?” Be completely honest about the parts of you that need work. Commit to working on them and being transparent about them with your person. No one is picture perfect and we all have a light and a dark side. Hopefully this level of self awareness will create a solid foundation between you and our special someone.
Here are some questions you can sit at the table and ask yourself:
What parts of me do I need/want to improve?
What makes me happy?
Am I emotionally available?
Do I have trust issues from a past relationship?
Can I communicate and express my feelings openly?
What are my fears when it comes to relationships?
Am I emotionally or sexually connected to someone else?
How do I handle conflict and disagreements?
What is my love language?